God has bigger plans for me than I have for myself.

   I haven't blogged in quite a while, but life has been very busy. Finals are almost over and San Marcos has been crazy. Everyone has been so stressed with finals and summer plans, that I feel like we forget why we are here. Yes I am here to get an education, but the way I see it, when I look back on my college years I'm not going to remember getting an A in physics, I'm going to remember staying out late with all of my friends, going dancing, and stuffing ourselves with IHOP. I just think we take life way to seriously sometimes, it's like we forget that there is a lot more than this. 
   This is how have come to a very wonderful realization. I don't care anymore. I stress so much about money, and school, and life, but no matter how much I worry, God always takes care of it anyway... so why don't I just enjoy the ride and see where it goes? I've also decided that I want to see the world, and not in just a travel once a year to an exotic tourist destination, but I want to live in another country. God created so much, and we see so little, I want to experience and see as much of this world as I can. So I'm adding it to my bucket list: Live in another country for at least a year. I'm excited, and I want to do it as soon after graduation as I can, which means I have a good amount of time to start saving, but that means I have to start now. 
   I've also realized that I can never let another person change my goals. I realize the fact that when I get married my priorities will change, which is why I'm not stressing about it anymore. There are a lot of things that I want to do with my life, and it doesn't really make a difference to me whether I find that person after I've accomplished those things, or whether they want to accomplish those things with me. God has bigger plans for me than I have for myself, and I need to keep remembering that. There's so much more in the world than falling in love, and I've seen that as my focus for so long. But it's all shifting now... and there is so much more.

Friendship

I've been thinking a lot about what friendship is lately. Whenever I can't decide how I feel about something I try to think about what God thinks of it. I feel like back in the day when Jesus walked on the Earth, he was probably a really awesome friend. But back then they didn't have cell phones, facebook, or skype, and that's a huge part of how we build and maintain our relationships now. So I wonder what Jesus was like as a friend... I'm sure he was extremely busy, he wasn't able to always be there when his friends wanted him too. But I also think that he was probably the best friend any of them ever had. And it wasn't just because He was God, but he legitimately cared about them all. And isn't that really what friendship is? Just caring about someone, and being there for them when they really need you? Yeah it requires quality time, but overall, its not about how much time, it's about those few times when all you want to do is cry, and your friend is there for you, and not only holds you but cries with you. When they can tell how your feeling just by the look in your eyes. Someone that you can pray with, laugh with, and worship with. Sometimes I get upset with my friends too easily, I take them for granted. But I can guarantee the thing I think I thank God for the most is my friends. I am EXTREMELY blessed, some people feel like they never have anywhere to turn, or anyone that will pray with them. But I have so many friends that will just sit there with me and pray and seek and who truly just care about me. God gives us these special friends for a reason, and I know with many of my friends, we may move away, or not talk every day, but it's the closeness of our hearts that keep us close. Knowing no matter what that these people are going to be there if I really need them. If I was across the country and I needed them, that they would book the first flight to be there, that's what I think true friendship is. Sometimes I get sad when I think about the future because I know my friendships won't all be the same. And it hurts me to think that I won't live near all the people I care about so much. But God gives us people for a reason and a season. And I will cherish the memories forever, and always keep them close to my heart. 

A New Year

I have been back at Texas State for about three weeks now. I missed it so much! But this year is a little different. I got a job as an RA this year, so obviously this cuts into my social life quite a lot. It's been a little difficult just transitioning to always being busy. If I'm not on call or working the desk, I have homework. And if I am for some reason free I jam pack every minute that I have so my social life will remain alive.

 I also have an 8am class this semester... honestly I thought I was going to hate it. But the truth is I have started to love it. Not so much the class itself but the 5 minute walk I have from my hall in the morning. Walking across campus at 7:45 in the morning has its simple pleasures. The campus is nearly empty, there are squirrels everywhere, the sun hasn't quite risen all the way. It's beautiful. That's really one of those moments when I feel so blessed. How can I complain about my life when I  am in such a beautiful place? I find my joy in those moments, it's like God knows exactly what's going to put a smile on my face and sets it up for that morning while I walk to class. I feel like sometimes I complain about a lot of things. But the truth is I have everything that I need and more. Something I read the other night hit me hard. 

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?"

Matthew 6:25-27

It really puts life into perspective for me =) I've read it like a thousand times but it's still one of my favorite verses.

<3 Gracie